Thanksgiving Vegetable Side Dish

[Fullmetal Alchemist] Miss Christmas

Title: Miss Christmas
Fandom: Fullmetal Alchemist
Characters: Jean Havoc, Riza Hawkeye
Pairing : Havoc / Roy / Riza
Prompt: Dressing up as Santa Claus
Rating: PG-15
Party: 1 / 1
Beta: mapi_littleowl
Warning: AU (for Amestris is not Christmas and I put it here instead of there, patience), Threesome
Spoiler: None
Word Count: 4145 ( Contaparole )
Summary: Havoc wants to do a very special gift to Roy and he needs the help of Riza. But she has no intention to listen to it.
Notes: Written Advent Calendar for the [out of the race] held by michiru_kaiou7
Discaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist and its characters belong to Hiromu Arakawa and therefore I do not gain anything except the taste to do what I want them * evil laugh *.



'Jean ... do you know what these are? "
Jean Havoc - at that moment was intention to give the food that had just brought to him by the deli on the corner looks a bit 'more homemade - heard only in passing, the question that Riza Hawkeye had just done so, thoughtful as ever, gave up everything he was doing a brisk pace and left the kitchen, finding himself in less than five seconds in the hall decked.
"Did you say something?" Asked, running his hands dirty with flour on her jeans, and the woman standing beside the Christmas tree with an expression between surprised and angry on his face, not even turned in his direction when he repeated the question he had done shortly before. "I've just asked them what are they?" Havoc
shifted his gaze to follow hers, in a fixed point at the foot of the tree and raised an eyebrow: "I have boots ..."
"I see I which are boots, "she snapped, tightening and lifting shoes fist in the air, to study them better, were very long - certainly she would have been far below the knee, if it ever occurred to the sock idea to put it - leather, with a long thin heel just under a foot and a color that was somewhere between brown and black. Riza was silent for several seconds, letting his gaze was lost in the interweaving of strings that seemed to climb and climb along the leg to infinity, and then slammed the eyelashes several times, swallowing quietly and wondering why, in that room Only she seemed surprised by the fact that something so bad taste was magically appeared in his house. "What I want to know is ... well ... "he began, but was not entirely sure you want really know," How we ended up under the tree? "
" There I put myself, "Havoc said with a shrug of the shoulders and an amused smile on his face, but when Riza turned in his direction, looking at him with eyebrows raised, eyes wide and his jaw tight, he swallowed and took a step back, putting himself on the defensive. I had seen him angry in the past - although, now that I think, usually in that way she got angry with the Colonel and not with him - but the Lightning murderer who had passed in those brown eyes made him fear for his life seriously. He would not have pulled out the gun, right?
"What, pray?" His voice had a touch of metal, at that time, Havoc and feels entitled to make another one, to step back. May I ask why you so angry?!
"It's a gift for the Colonel," he began, hoping that this would bring down the anger of the woman at least in part, and almost contrary to all expectations, his plan had the desired effect: suddenly, the expression Riza's face changed, most dramatically, and all the anger that had until that moment unrestricted shone in his eyes was gone, melted like snow in the sun. Now there was amazement on his face, and Havoc was finally able to release all the air had not noticed the star holding. Not that he would shoot him and calmed him a lot.
"A gift for the Colonel?" She said then, suddenly, returning to look at the boots with a critical eye - almost doubtful - and tilting a little 'head on one side, as if doing so would better reflect.
Was there something wrong with her that night, he thought Havoc, swallowing and crossing his arms to his chest, defensively, the more the silence that had fallen in the room showed no signs of breaking His hands itched more, making me want to tear that damn pair of boots from the hands to throw them out the window, down the street. Of course it would never reach that far - the first part of him because he was afraid that Riza would not have taken all well and second, because those damn shoes had cost more than the entire dinner put together, and we do not would be released until they had a chance to exploit them fully - but the temptation was strong, very, very strong.
The man ran his hand nervously on the neck and then, suddenly, Riza turned toward him, watching with a mixture of pity and reproach you. "You wasted your money," she said with a barely concealed smugly. "Because, if you are interested to know how I feel, I do not think that the Colonel may feel good, are not his style."
Havoc opened his mouth. "But should not put mica him" she cried, her cheeks on fire - and not knowing if he should laugh or be afraid of the image that was just passed in the head - and the woman slammed a few times the eyelids, confused. "And who should make them, then?"
Silence fell between them again because Havoc had absolutely no intention to answer that question. Was it not obvious who should have them? The two soldiers were left to look for several minutes, waiting for the other to take the initiative, and when Riza frowned, noting that he could not guess if he did not say anything, Havoc raised an eyebrow, a wink in her direction. But do you think? was saying his eyes, and when she finally got the message, went back to look at the boots with a mixture of horror and hatred.
"You can forget," he said, dropping to the ground as if they were old rags. "I will never put such a thing, ever."
Havoc opened his mouth, amazed. "But I said it to the Colonel! You can not at least do it for him? "he tried pleading with the tone he could muster.
"Absolutely no ," she answered, without a shred of hesitation, and then lowered his eyes for a moment on the boots, raising an eyebrow. "And then you can know what you thought of taking them?" He asked, leaning both hands on her hips and began to scratch his neck Havoc, just averting the gaze. "It seemed a good idea. And then they were so good with the rest ... "
" The rest ? What else are you talking about? "There was a note of panic in his voice, but Havoc, too saddened and angry that the idea Colonnello non avrebbe mai saputo del meraviglioso regalo che lui aveva avuto intenzione di fargli, non lo notò nemmeno. «La roba nella borsa,» si limitò a rispondere, con un sospiro, ammiccando in un punto dietro il piede della donna e Riza si voltò di scatto, notando solo in quel momento un borsone verde scuro nascosto dietro i rami più bassi del piccolo abete addobbato con luci colorate e grosse palle rosse che riflettevano le luminarie.
Rimase a guardarla per diversi istanti, non sapendo nemmeno lei se quello che stava provando in quel momento era curiosità o paura di scoprire fino a che punto Havoc sarebbe stato in grado di spingersi, con quell'idea ridicola, ma alla fine riuscì a vincere l'iniziale esitazione e si voltò, crouch down and open the zipper of the bag with a fluid motion without hesitation.
For some strange reason, the room suddenly fell silent - it seemed that even the clock had stopped ticking - and none of them spoke until Riza, with an expression between surprised and horrified, he pulled out of the a bag skirt.
Although, then found himself thinking, maybe skirt was not exactly the best word to describe what they had just discovered his hands. He the form of a skirt, that was undeniable, but it was so short-Riza was not even sure that would come to the groin, if anything had worn - that it might be better to call a large belt. And maybe he would have done even if attached to it, there was really was a wide belt, leather boots and the same color with a gold stud which alone weighed more than all the clothes put together.
turned it over nervously in his hands, studying with a grimace the makings of a bright red and white fur and soft sewn to the brim, and then, without even standing up, he turned back to Havoc, holding that ridiculous garment with two fingers, as if it were infected. "And I you think I should have put even such a thing?"
The man squeezed between the shoulders, pressing his lips against each other, and Riza moves her head from side to side, letting a moan escape from his throat and startled after throwing the ridiculous skirt above the boots once again slipped his hand into the bag, with the tip fingers touched something soft and harpies so the garment and pulled it out, then his eyes opening wide in surprise.
was ... was ... did not know exactly what to call it - a bra? A brief T-shirt? - Was simply something that was halfway between underwear and something that people would normally worn when it was too hot to go around even with short sleeves: it did not have shoulder pads, in fact, only a strip of soft hair on top, and looked better now that Riza was only a closure on the back, similar to that of a corset, while the front a pair of chopsticks rigid drew the shape of a breast. of his breast, eye and cross, and the woman, not knowing if it were more upset by the fact that Havoc had guessed its size or the fact that she, for a moment, she had found herself thinking that if he wore her boobs would have seemed twice as big, also threw one on the pile.
That situation became more and more ridiculous with each passing second and Riza, after he had finally emptied the bag - pulling out the remains and that is a pair of gloves short dark and a ridiculous Santa Claus hat - stood up again and again, cast a quick glance at junk that had amassed on the ground before returning to look at the man across the room . How the hell could he think she would agree to wear something like that?
"Well," he began, resting his hands firmly on hips and looking at him with a frown between the injured and severely. "What you have to say in your defense?"
Havoc barely kept his voice in my throat. Excuse? should have been excused for thinking to make a gift - that there was no doubt that the other would greatly welcome - the Colonel? No, absolutely not! The two stayed for a few more seconds in silence, facing and staring at each other as if, suddenly, one should raise in the air the sound of gongs and two of them would have to jump on him and beating each other until the end of their days, but so irritating when Riza arched eyebrow, implying that, no, she had no intention of waiting all day to hear his excuses, Havoc could no longer hold my tongue.
"I have nothing to say in my defense, since it has not done anything wrong." She opened her eyes and lips by surprise, but before she could resume her word to say what's what, the man continued, crossing his arms to his chest, and pulling on just the chin, monkey, almost. "And if you really want to know my opinion of it I think it to you having to make excuses,"
She blinked her eyes once again, shocked. "I do not think you understand ..."
"You understand very well, Riza," he interrupted, taking a step forward and continue to make until she was so close to her, to be able to face, found himself reluctantly forced to take a step back and raise his head up. "I spent a lot of money to buy all that stuff, but, apart from the economic damage because of you I will present to the Colonel without a shred of gift since I have neither the time to think about what else to give him nor andarglielo to buy, since he will be here in less than an hour. So yes, you got it right, you owe me an apology. "
This was the last straw, really, and Havoc had just committed the biggest mistake he could have done: he had exceeded, by far, his threshold of tolerance. Riza clenched his jaw, clenching his hands holding the sides with so much force that not only whiten the knuckles but also became ill herself, and then threw out air from the nose, angry. He could tell you all you really loved him enough to endure almost everything, but would never have allowed anyone to say that, because of her, Christmas would be ruined.
"Listen you," he began, by spreading the attack and forcing him to retreat. "It is useless to come and tell me that my fault your gift is ruined, you know? You should have thought before, you should ... Goodness, Havoc, you could have ask my opinion, is not it? "
The man blushed. "And when I would have asked you, as you become a monster under the parties hysterical and intractable? No, no, but you're right, "he added, before she could say, 'I was stupid to think I can count on your help, "the brief outburst ended with a nervous gesture of the arms and then, without saying anything, walked away from her and turned away, running a hand through his blond tufts that fell over his forehead.
Riza stood looking at him all the time with his lips glued to each other and their eyes wide open, wondering if he was always so stupid or if perhaps she - and the Colonel, of course, because he had the slightest intention of taking full responsibility - should be responsible. He took a deep breath, casting a glance back to your clothes abandoned on the ground under the branches of the tree, and then she will step both hands in her hair, forcing us to stay calm. It was true that the monster was called hysterical and intractable, it was true that he had said that about her you could never count - that phrase alone would have earned him a bullet in his knee, if the situation had not been so critical - but she was willing to defer. As long as he had settled down and had given a commitment to realize how stupid was that her attitude.
"Look, Jean," he began, with the best intentions, "I can also try to understand it, your point of view, but this does not alter the fact that you did something stupid and that maybe it would be the case with a small examination of conscience, do not you think? "He turned to look at her but said nothing, and the woman still breathing in other ara nose, came the calm again, beginning again to speak. "I mean, ignoring the fact that, as I said before, it would be better if you had asked me before you buy this stuff, well '... but because you had to give just that? You could not buy anything else? something normal? "
" He wanted this, "he said, in the end, just shrugging his shoulders, and when he noticed the surprised look in the eyes of the woman his eyes began to shine fun. What took them? Possible that it had not even crossed my mind that perhaps it was precisely the Colonel to ask? "I spoke almost two months ago," he continued, bevendosi eyes all the security that she had boasted that moment to disappear, giving way to two wide open eyes and a sad and pale complexion, almost hurt. "We were talking about Christmas presents and he said he would not at all disappointed to find under the Christmas tree with a young lady to have fun during the holidays. At the time I had not even thought about the possibility that it could happen, but a few days ago I came back to mind the conversation and said to myself: "Damn you, Jean, but you know it the perfect Miss Christmas!" and so I gave done about everything you need. It was a real hard job and you have no idea how shit get the idea that everything was wasted. "
Riza heard that story in silence and kept perfectly still and when he finished - in conclusion, of course, with a sentence that should have been sorting the effect of making her feel guilty - she could not help but think that, yes, all this made perfect sense. Despite everything she knew that Havoc would never have asked such a thing without a valid reason and, in retrospect, it was said that was really stupid not to realize that all this - ridiculous clothes and the rest - was the fruit of the union of two minds: bra a balcony to make it very short skirt and shows her tits to do the same with his legs. Obvious.
He ran again a hand through his hair. "I should not let you be alone to do certain things behind me," she said with a tone of reproach that Havoc did not understand if it were addressed to him or if she was using it against itself, and before he could even think of something clever to say to her she shook her head from side to side, inconsolable. "I can not really believe that at your age do even certain things, really: you're not a bit 'big fantasy for these school-age development?" Havoc
bent his lips in an amused smile. "I do not You're never too big for certain fantasies, especially when you have the opportunity to make real ... "
" If you truly believe that I will help you to make this fantasy reality you're wrong. "
" Come on, Riza, you cost? "he said, spreading his arms and again using his pathetic pleading tone:" Basically you do not have to go around, you have to be closed in the room, you do not see anyone! "She opened her mouth to reply that their l 'and that they would view, for what I was concerned, they were also too many, but he would not allow her to do so: "And do not even have to hold on for so long, well ... give us time to make up for eyes and then ... "
" Jean! " Riza's cheeks were painted red with a lovely, but the embarrassment vanished when she realized that the issue was not resolved. Havoc we still hoped to be able to convince her, and would have been better for everyone if she had put to good things clear. "I do not care that I do not see anyone or I'll hold onto them for a while: I have no intention of doing so, and if you continue to ask me will only make me angry even more." He said with a tone of determination and with a look even stronger, but, apparently, all that it was no determination with Havoc.
"Please," begged her, in fact, joining hands and bowing his head as if he were bowing. "If you do not want to do it for me at least do it for the Colonel! Do not want to ruin Christmas, right? "
" His Christmas will not be ruined by some nonsense like that, "she said, even though he knew it was not true. Havoc It did not take long to make him out. "But stop, you know it I'm right!" He said, placing a hand on her hip and began to gesticulate with the other. "If it will make him a gift or, worse, gets to know that we boycotted held a grudge against each other from now until next summer. You know it's true, Riza, it is useless to try to deny it. "
She said no, not right now, trying to find a loophole, but the fact Havoc was that he was right: the Colonel was perhaps one of the most childish people she had ever known, especially when it came to issues pertaining to a festival like that, and if it was just something really happened on Christmas Day she knew not would have stopped most of them feel guilty. He ran a hand through his hair, trying to think what to do, but when it passed to her that the only solution was to accommodate Havoc is said that, rather, would have thought herself to make Christmas a hell for everyone.
"I do not ever put that stuff," he said, just when the man began to think that perhaps could have a chance to win.
"But why not?"
"Because it's humiliating," she said, determined, and after trying in vain to hide the blush on his cheeks and he crossed his arms to his chest shrugged, starting to talk. "And then ... Put it you, this stuff, so if you care to find him a Miss under the Christmas tree! "
Havoc opened his mouth, but, contrary to what she had expected, his sentence does not kind to her the 'effect she had expected. The wonder, in fact, vanished from the face of the man almost immediately and with a firm voice - so still that she, days later, he would find myself asking What would happen if he insisted on a bit 'more - said: "I would if they were my size!"
Among them fell silent again. Riza began to whisk her eyelids and stepped back a few inches, not knowing whether to laugh or if you have to have to be afraid of what the man who stood in front had just said, and Havoc, seeing the hesitation that a crack would could help to break, if not in heart, at least in the piety of the woman approached her again, slowly, with the words printed on the face and wounded more pathetic - as a puppy abandoned, Roy would say, leaving and starting to soften behind him the scratch card ear as if he were a real dog - that Riza had ever seen on the face of a human being.
The man said nothing, when he was less than a step away from her, and without saying a word opened his arms and leaned forward, hugging and leaning his forehead against the woman. She stood there all the time, in his mercy, almost, but after a few moments she looked up, trying to see any expression on the face of the man to help her understand what was going through my head . "What?" She asked him then, not having had satisfactory results from the silent exchange of glances, and he leaned even more, by relying on his shoulder. Riza
called his name several times and put his open palms on his broad chest, trying unsuccessfully to free herself from that embrace, but suddenly the sound too similar to the purr of a cat caught her ear and she froze place, beginning to wonder how far the other would be willing to go to get her to do what he wanted. She called his name again and pushed back with his hands, and then, suddenly, he spoke again, using the most plaintive tone and unbearable that she had ever heard.
" Daaaaaaaaaaaai, " he said, and not just the echo of that word disappeared Havoc moved and rested her cheek against the Women's, starting to get up and down with his head, rubbing against her. Riza warned him, told him to stop, if you did not want to anger her more, but his words seemed to be swallowed by all the , the and please know that I enjoy yourself that filled the ears, and after a while ', due to rapid movements of the child's voice and man laughed. Risa Short, interspersed with his repeated attempts to get rid off, and when he could not get over the woman looked up into the air and trying to be serious and convincing, he said that was fine, he would do whatever she wanted as long as that he had raised it off. E Havoc did not pray.
"Will you really?" He asked, looking into her face with blue eyes that shone with joy and clasping his hands on his arms, and Riza hit him in the shoulder with a well-aimed punch. "I will," he said, looking into his eyes. "But only if you promise me that next year you'll be the ones who dressed up for Christmas. Reindeer, "and pointed Havoc laughed, assuring that she would have done that and more, and bent down to give her a single kiss. "You will not regret."